tune kyu na kaha…
maine keh to diya
par tumne samjha nahi
dil ki baatein jo thi
woh kahan mit gayi
tumhara haal na mera sa hai
tumhari khushi mein bhi gham sa hai
na hum keh sake
na tum samajh paaye
dil ki baatein jo thi
woh dil mein hee reh gayi
tumne apna jahan hai bana liya
kho se gaye ho naye jahan mein tum
baat adhoori chod gaye ho tum
iska ehsaas na ab tumko raha
phir se aaye ho nazar mein tum
dil mein uthi hai chahat phirse
jaane kyu yeh umang ab hai chidi
jab iska na matlab koi raha
lamha beet gaya
ab na ho phir pehal
kuch baatein adhoori hee sahi
Get stoned!!!
How do you feel when you know your ex has moved on and is not single anymore.. good, bad or nothing??
When I got to know, I wished I felt good or at the least nothing.. but no.. it wasn’t so.. I tried a lot to convince myself that this is how life is; girl – no relationship is pure and it is all fake. But instead, I felt bad and worst of all I felt sad for myself.
I remember, once when we were just having a conversation, and I asked him ‘would you get involved with another girl if ours didn’t work out’ and he replied ‘not for atleast five years’:). Believe me, I did feel bad then, but there was no point in bringing it up.. whatever be it, he is already into another relationship and guess what .. it’s hardly been a year.. well this is what life is and this is how men are..:)
It’s funny to see how human mind reacts to certain things. It’s funny to see how human mind has no control over their emotions. I don’t blame him for anything now. It’s true that time and distance heals everything. But still there are times in your life when the past keeps cropping up and you can’t erase everything out of your life completely. It’s like a part of you has been stolen forever and yet you want it. You act hard and harsh but you never forget what you really are.
Showers again….
It’s quite some time that I even logged into wordpress account. Off late, I have been quite occupied with my work and several other things and thank God for keeping me so busy, inspite of the fact that I have been frustrated to an extent due to my work. But I still want to thank you for keeping my mind off the thoughts that tortured me.
It is true that time heals everything, and I have changed with time and so have my thoughts. I am no more the same person I used to be while I was in school, college or a few months back. And yes, I like the change. I feel good about the circumstances that have got changes within me. And, I feel good about myself. I feel I have crossed several milestones in my life.
I have always asked God for the better things in my life, and he has been too generous towards me. And as well made me realize of the pros and cons of my desires:). I just want to thank you for keeping me going strong through the times when I had lost all the faith in humanity and in you. And you never fail to get back my faith in you by giving me the best I ought to have.
Thank you for everything and love you for all the happiness you’ve got in my life. Be with me always. Love you.
This is me…
Sometimes I feel there is a lot I can tell you about me, and sometimes I am left searching for words to describe me. And that is me, confused, daring, honest, unpredictable, detached and unconventional. A typical Aquarian best described by Linda Goodman with a few exceptions.
I believe freedom to live life your own way is every individual’s right, and to me my freedom is very important. Freedom to me means not living life on others terms, be it the people who I love or my colleagues at work. I hate being controlled and guided in their own way. If you have thoughts, just give me the options and leave it to me to make my decisions. Do not force your decisions on to me, I get highly agitated. Set me free to learn from my own mistakes. This is not my attitude, this is how I am. I will love you and respect you all the more once you let me be the way I am. Do not possess me, I belong only to myself.
I still don’t know what kind of a man I would like to spend my entire life with. I have given a serious thought to this facet of my life, and am still doing the analysis. But one thing is for sure, I cannot love someone unless he is my very good friend. He has to be someone who knows me in and out. He has to be someone whom I respect and admire, a respect not demanded. He should be someone who would know when I need space and when I want to be wanted. He should be conversative, smart, loyal, inspiring, interesting, flirting and someone who could make me laught out loud even when I am sixty. I am not asking for a miracle to occur, but a hope still remains.
Keep the faith!!!
We make mistakes. We hurt others emotions knowingly and unknowingly. We believe our life is more important than other’s. Sometimes we even annoy others for no reason. We scold people. We curse people. We blame others for our incomplete dreams and aspirations. We believe we go wrong because of others influence on our decisions. We make our own decisions and yet fear the outcome. And there are many like these people, including me. We all want the best for ourselves and we do realize what all we lose on our way of getting the best. And then we hate ourselves and believe that everything happened for the best, which I can never figure out, no matter how much I try.
I have crossed twenty five years of my life and am still not sure what I want from my life. Do I really want anything out of my life? This question keeps haunting me several times and I never find an answer to it. All I want is to be happy and just happy. And this happpiness is very very very expensive which I only happen to get in bits.
But now I’ve realized that happiness is in being happy with others. Your happiness has no meaning when it hurts others. I’ll try not to live a lie again. And today is the day I turn my life around the way it should have been. I have realized that I got to move on and be whom I am. And I am gonna do everything I can.
The day – today – madness
What a day i have had today, worth putting down i guess. Everything is just going on so strange, and so unexpected that I have concluded that today it’s going to be a bad day in every way.. To put it down, it all started with an accident. Although it was a minor one but the impact seems to be never ending.
As usual I had left home for work, and I happened to bang into one beautiful big car. I do not know how and when it happened, but it happened. The guy inside the car went on screaming and I stood behind just telling “I am Sorry”, I really don’t know how I happened to hit the car when everything was going so smooth, and the entire crowd was staring at me as if I appeared nude… Believe me, I hated being the centre of attraction at that point of time, inspite of the fact that the car was completely fine and there wasn’t any deformation. The man inside yelled for few seconds and moved ahead.
And when my bike moved, there was an ugly noisy sound which left me startled. I didn’t know what had happened to my bike, and the second it made that sound, I felt all the more humiliated. I somehow managed to push the vehicle to the opposite road in order to find a mechanic, but in no gain and only pain. I don’t know what struck my mind and I started riding again only to hear the loud stretching noise again and everybody was turning and looking at me making me feel so embarassed. I immediately got down and started pushing for close to half a kilometre in search of a mechanic which left me really tiring. I parked my vehicle near a building and walked to the nearest mechanic and got my bike repaired (all he had to do was get the front part of my bike in shape using pliers) and after that it was perfectly fine, but the rest of my day does not seem to be going as normal.
Since the accident, I kind of seem to have a strange feeling within me, something like as if the blood within me rushing in an opposite direction. I entered the office only to find my access blocked as I had not swiped the last evening. Then I pinged an unknown person for tea instead of my friend, to which he replied “I don’t mind” 
. Then I happened to find that every month an amount of Rs.500 is getting credited into my FoodPlus card which I haven’t used it since ages. Likewise, I am going around dropping stuffs, moving up and down the building, including my account getting locked (which was just a call away to unlock though). But this day seems to be very very strange. Ho ho ho… I just received a call (wrong number) to deliver packages from Hyderabad:). May be I am exaggerating, but things are really abnormal today.
Spirit to LIVE…
I believe I don’t need people or anyone around me to make me happy. My happiness lies with me and in how complete I feel with myself rather than depending on someone to make me feel happy. I believe every woman should live life the way she would be happy with herself rather than believing that there is someone else to make her happy.
I have seen many women who believe their life begins and ends with their husbands. Their life is all about sacrificing for the one man who in no way has ever respected her decisions. These men always believe that they are right and never consider their partner’s decision or their happiness. And at the same time, it is the wives of such men who do not even have the courage to stand up for themselves. There are several such women who have no position in their family. It is not that I hate men, it’s just that I don’t respect such men; and such men demand respect as though it is their right to be honoured.
We deserve a good life not because we are women but because it is every individual’s right. And the day we realize that our happiness does not depend on one person, we can live to be happy even within a crowd of thousands or just by ourself. Be happy with yourself and welcome the change in your life with a big smile.
He is….
He inspires me to think and grow
He admires me when I achieve a little
He encourages me when I lose faith
He appreciates me when I want to be
He needs me more than I do
He supports me when he knows I am right
He listens when I want someone to be heard
He understands what I want when
He smiles when he sees me happy
He understands why I am depressed
He knows when I need him
He knows what is important to me
He is my best friend
He is my soulmate
He is ….. a DREAM!!!
New Year!!!
Finally, the year 2009 has arrived. Wishing all the living creatures of this universe a very happy new year. May God bless all of us with lots and lots of happiness.
I had been desperately waiting for the year 2008 to get over, and for the new year to begin. The past year has not been very nice to me. I have had some really bad moments both personally as well as professionally which will always remain as a part of my life no matter how much I try to escape. All what I can hope is for some peace and happiness this year and immense growth . Oh God, if you exist, please do remember that I exist too.
The new year has kicked off just fine, exactly the way I wanted it to. May everything get peaceful for me as well as everyone around me.
Deviled!!!
Sometimes, some people are so annoying. They just can’t stop praising themselves. All they need is someone to whom they can tell how great and lucky they are. And you’re there listening to their shit with just a hmm…. and it sucks, especially when your mind is playing games and you are trying to get your priorities clear.
And such people just bump in at the most unexpected time and irritate you, thereby making you realize what you have lost and what you don’t have. All what I feel like telling them is “I hate to have this blasted discussion”. It is that minute of time when you just want to close all your doors at their faces and say good-bye. All what you can hope is that you get one stupid call and escape them for the moment. But none of such things happen, and you are there with a big artificial smile and saying hmm.. right… yeah… and feel so pathetic. You can feel your patience being tested and sense how fast you are losing it.
Oh!! My life!!:)
mindsparkle
